6 Red Flags to Watch out For in Your BDSM Relationship

Bondage Games

Trust is crucial in any relationship. This goes double for BDSM arrangements due to their specific nature. Just because BDSM relationships are about exploration and sexual expression doesn’t mean there aren’t limitations. Instead, the BDSM community has its own set of rules. If you’re interested in entering the submissive dating world, you need to know the red flags when looking for a dominant. By understanding them, you’ll be able to avoid dominants who aren’t in the BDSM world for the right reasons.

They don’t believe in a safe word

If you talk to a dom who doesn’t believe in using a safeword or ignores your safeword, run. This is someone who doesn’t respect the basics of BDSM and can cause severe damage to you. If your dom continues after you’ve said your safeword, you need to find another dominant. Of course, you should talk about it after the session, and try to figure out what happened first. However, a safeword is designed to protect the sub from acts that go beyond their personal boundaries. If your dom isn’t respecting your wishes, then they’re breaking your trust in them.

They think you need to be broken

This is one of the most common and well known red flags. Some doms have the idea that their subs need to be broken; similar to how you’d tame a wild animal. They believe in order for the sub to properly obey them, they need to break and remold their submissive entirely. This can be a huge red flag.

If your dom wants to “break you down,” and if you consent to this, they need to have a plan of how they’re going to build you back up again. The plan needs to be concrete and focus on building confidence in you. If a dom has never done this before or refuses to talk about their previous subs, then that’s a sign their experiences with breaking people down didn’t work too well.

They exclude you from the BDSM community

There’s a huge difference between being controlling and being jealous. We can all be a little jealous; however, being controlling is an entirely different thing. If your dom is trying to control you by preventing you from speaking to other people in the BDSM community, they aren’t a real dom. The BDSM community exists for like-minded people to connect and create relationships. If your dom isn’t allowing you to do that, then you need a new dom.

Prevent you from using social media

“Social Media Blocking” is a relatively new red flag, but is equally dangerous as the rest on our list. Social media blocking is when all communications (texts, Whatsapp, emails, Facebook, etc.) go through your dom. As a sub, they don’t allow you any private communication; everything needs to go through them first. This behavior is extremely controlling as they don’t want you to meet anyone else. If they’re controlling how you communicate, they’re also deciding who you communicate with. In other words, they slowly remove people from your life.

They don’t see you as a person

Regardless if you’re a dom or sub, you’re a person. It doesn’t matter if you’re roleplaying or being whipped, you’re still a human being with rights. If a dom tries to take your basic rights away from you; preventing you from speaking your opinion, then this is something you need to look into. Just because you enjoy being submissive, doesn’t mean you’re less of a person.

They don’t follow the agreed rules

Like we said before, BDSM isn’t a free-for-all; instead, it has specific rules for both subs and doms to follow. Of course, each relationship has its agreed rules as well. These rules ensure both you and your dom are on the same page. However, if your dom isn’t following the rules, then this is a red flag. The rules symbolize respect for the relationship and safety. If a dom is deciding to change the rules without your knowledge, that’s a problem. By breaking the rules, it’s clear they don’t respect you as a sub.

If you notice one of these red flags in your BDSM relationship, it doesn’t mean you need to break up right away. But it does mean you need to communicate with your partner and pay more attention to the relationship. If the red flags continue or become worse, you’ll need to decide whether or not the relationship is worth it. When looking at the red flags, listen to your gut. What is it telling you? If you have a feeling that something isn’t right, that’s because it isn’t.

Sado’s Chamber – Cock and Ball Chastity Fun

Master series Sado’s chamber silicone male chastity device

 

Does the thought of submission tickle your fancy?

Does giving somebody control arouse you?

DO THE WORDS…

CBT – CUCKOLDING – KEY-HOLDING – TEASE & DENIAL

LIFT THE HAIRS ON THE BACK OF YOUR NECK?

 

I highly recommend addomt he SADO’S CHAMBER CHASTITY DEVICE to your bag of goodies

 

 Purpose of a chastity device

 

The application of a chastity belt is an indication of the control/dominance of the “key-holder” over the wearer’s sexual activities. By wearing the chastity belt the submissive/slave accepts surrender of control over their sexual desires to the other partner, who may grant permission to the wearer to engage in sexual activity by unlocking the chastity device. The dominant may decide when, where, how often, and even if, the submissive is allowed their sexual release. This is a great element of control in a power exchange, as the controlling of ones sexual arousal, release and even orgasms can be both empowering and a lot of fun for each of the people involved.

 

The wearer of the belt or chastity is known as the sub/slave in a BDSM relationship. This is a part of the wider practice of tease & denial, some people claim it increases submissiveness in their men, other people claim it gets males to be more in tune with their emotions, feelings and state of mind. It has often been reported that when worn, the chastity belt frequently reminds the slave of the sexual frustration they could experience. There’s actually scientific research that’s been placed in this with the effects that an orgasm has on the chemical balance of an individual and how that can in turn affect their personality, and their day to day goings.

Most belt designs cannot prevent wearers from physically touching their genitals but they do usually prevent masturbation. Although devices may hold the penis firm, they can  be loose and, even though sex is impossible, it is possible for manual stimulation even to orgasm however often resulting in a ruined orgasm. The most effective masturbation prevention requires design features that incorporate piercings or a completely enclosed chastity device

 

 

 SET INCLUDES

 

– 1 silicone cage/tube

– 3 graduated size silicone back rings

– 2 plastic cinch straps

– 5 individually numbered plastic seal locks

– 1 padlock with 2 keys

 

Ring measurements are:

– 2” diameter (52mm)

– 1.75” diameter (47mm)

– 1.5” diameter (41mm)

 

How to apply your brand new chastity device

Please ensure you set up your device correctly, a poorly set up chastity device could result in a serious injury

At first look whilst still in the box my thoughts were it was going to be an easy application with the device but once I took everything out of the box there were heaps of parts and I was a little confused on how to set it up. All you need is; your shaft tube  – ring – cinch strap with white clip – and padlock/numbered plastic lock.

 

multi part chastity cage in silicone
Silicone CBT Chamber Unboxed

Step 1

Apply a small amount of water based lubricant onto yourself or to the device whichever is preferred to create easy application due too the product being completely silicone I recommend a trim/shave to help lower the risk of pinching whilst using the device , then grab the ring with your preferred measurement around your genital area then take out the small white clip for the lock seal onto

Step 2

Grab 1 of the 2 Cinch straps and push the white clip through one of the end holes and begin to thread the cinch strap through 1 of the top slots of the chastity tube and begin to wrap around the  back ring  whilst heading through the remaining 2 slots after you have reached the full way around back to the other side attach the cinch strap to the white clip again.

Step 3

Get out the padlock or numbered plastic locks and lock it up! 😏

The Sado’s chamber would have to be one of the most comfortable chastity devises I have worn and would definitely have to be the most comfortable I have been able to sleep in with no metal spikes or pieces to give pinching. It’s great for comfort whilst knowing you are still securely locked up.

With great size ventilation holes perfect for cleaning without removal this chamber is designed perfectly with a soft silky silicone for movement & comfort in favour of the slave/sub with no pins or sharp edges for any unwanted pinching.

 

Master Series