Solo Male Chastity!

porn addicts

Not everyone that engages in practicing male chastity is in a relationship. Nor, do they necessarily want to be in a relationship or better yet, they may not even require sexual satisfaction. It’s an interesting phenomenon that sees solo male chastity as either becoming a part of the desexualisation of the male figure, or as an attempt to curb their own sexual habits or even to abate their own sexual interests. Solo male chastity is a very interesting aspect of chastity because the psychology is vastly different than what it is within couple chastity.

In solo chastity, the key holder is essentially yourself, you both deny yourself and release yourself based on you and your needs. Sure, you can ask a friend to mind the key, and there are some friends out there that will not even hesitate to do this. Yet, not everyone has the friend, and the premise of solo chastity relies on your own ability to avoid temptation. There are many reasons why people will engage in solo male chastity. They might feel that they have a sexual compulsion problem which needs to be curbed, they might feel that they need to refocus their sexual energy towards other pursuits and endeavors, they might relish the idea of a personal challenge, they might find the idea of an unknown key holder to be incredibly alluring or they might simply seek to try something new. There are a variety of reasons why someone will engage themselves in solo male chastity.

Curbing Addiction:-

Fetish Porn is an incredibly large commodity in today’s media driven world with an estimated 71% percent of internet users at some stage accessing or consuming pornography. A study from 2009 suggested that the average single male consumed about 2 hours’ worth of porn per week. That’s on average, so there are a lot of males who consume porn at a much higher rate than that. 20% of males in the United States have admitted to accessing pornography at work. With such worrying statistics is it any wonder that some men seek the need to find help? I’m by no means suggesting that the consumption of pornography is a bad thing and there are plenty of studies that agree with this statement – however, as with most things too much of a certain thing can lead to issues. It can become problematic as the situation might cloud their judgement, or it might become an obstacle in daily life, or work life. We’ve mentioned several time throughout this website, that some people choose chastity in order to refocus their sexual energy onto different tasks, and this ‘addiction’ or consumption of pornography might be standing in the way of a few things. It is no small wonder than that there are men out there who, in order to curb their pornography consumption, have chosen to use a chastity device.

 

 

The benefits of using a chastity device are that it can lead to an increase in self-control, will power and determination; qualities which can transcend the realm of chastity devices and affect an individual’s daily life as well. Many men report that they have used a chastity device at work in order to help stave off their erections, arousal levels and become more productive at work. However, it does take a while to achieve that higher productivity as you become used to wearing a cage around your cock with the key safely at home. Thinking of the science of chastity and reading that article will help you in understanding the time lengths it can potentially take to increase productivity amidst the rollercoaster ride of dopamine, prolactin, and oxytocin. These men have also found that their orgasms are much stronger when they do eventually find sexual release simply because they’ve been holding out on themselves.

 

Asexuality & Low Sex Drives:-

The asexual population, or rather those that aren’t into sex or have exceptionally low sex drives, are also users of the chastity device. I was speaking to a friend recently with whom I asked about his decision to wear a chastity device. He explained it to me as whilst he found no sexual attraction in anyone, nor did he have a particularly high sex drive – he still would randomly get erections as the body tested out the arteries and ensures that everything was still functioning. He wore the chastity cage for two reasons; the first reason being that it prevented him getting erections. He’d read about the uses of chastity cages and discovered that there were some men out there who had managed to learn to control their erections throughout the day.

 

 

This appealed to my friend greatly, who often felt rather embarrassed at the thought of having an erection in front of other people. The second reason he offered was that it was a safety net for him. He had a very low sex drive, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to occasionally have sex or jerk himself off. This secured his cock firmly in a cage, the key safely at home and he didn’t feel the need to indulge himself every now and then. For him it was about the comfort and the satisfaction of knowing that if he was placed in a situation whereby his bodily urges attempted to overtake him, he would still be in control. Think of it like putting your Credit card in a cube of ice, to delay spending money that you do not have.

Further, there are some guys out there who want to practice celibacy, whether that be permanently, for a period of time due to religious or personal beliefs, or even if they simply want to cleanse the body.  Cock cages work wonderfully for these types of people who are new to practicing celibacy and need a bit of an extra security blanket to ensure that they don’t stray. These are only a couple of the reasons that single men choose to wear cock cages – but I hope that it provides a little insight into a seemingly mysterious world.

 

Unknown Key Holders:-

There are actually forums, and dedicated websites to individuals who want to be online key holder for other people. They find the idea of being in control of someone’s sexual urges to be a turn on for themselves, and they are there to help the people who want to engage in chastity, yet aren’t in a relationship, don’t have a friend willing to help and yet still want to be in a chastity relationship. These people might market themselves as chastity trainers, or as Mistresses and Masters who will look after you, and help you achieve the lifestyle of chastity that you want. Chastity slaves are generally held captive by their keyholder either through the physical submission of their key, or will be given a new lock with a code with which the chaste male may request for different reasons. There are a few things which might be different with an online chastity relationship as opposed to physical chastity relationship.

The male seeking chastity may discuss with the key-holder the length of time that the male has to remain in the chastity device. Once the allocated time has passed, the key or code will be given in order to free them. If the chaste male has broken a rule, or a guideline, then an extension of chastity may be given. The time may be days, weeks or even months, or it could be left unneeded with the chaste male having to perform certain tasks in order to complete his sentence.

 

relating to each other
key communication

 

Communication Is Key. As with all submissive and dominant relationships limits are discussed, put into a document or agreement and signed/agreed to by all parties. It would be wise to ensure that there is an agreement so that there are a sense of guidelines to the relationship.

A Physical Key, or code must be given to a third individual/party or put in safe keeping for emergencies. If something were to happen to the dominant, or key holder and there was an emergency, allowances must be given so that the chaste male can obtain freedom.

Once limits have been set, the chaste male has given over all control. From here the keyholder could get them to perform daily tasks, have fun with them in humiliating and obscene ways, or simply ensure that the chaste male is following all instructions. Failure to do this could result in an extension of the time spent in chastity, or they might be given increasingly humiliating acts as a form of punishment. Though it should be noted that not all chastity relationships contain elements of humiliation and that there are other tasks that can be completed in the absence of humiliation. In virtual key holding situations – the chaste male will need to provide proof that the tasks are being completed and proof could be given in the form of photos, videos, emails, text, or voice. The situations and the tasks are endless. We have provided an example of some humiliating assignments that might be used:

  • Do not wear underwear and socks
  • Go to a nude beach
  • Walk around gym locker room nude
  • Wear white spandex/lycra while jogging or at gym
  • Shower only with cold water
  • Insert 2 golf balls in the ass for 24 hours
  • Shave all body hair below your neck. Keep shaved during sentence
  • Wear a leather slave collar in public
  • Wear a butt plug with a tail on it for an entire day
  • Grab a black marker and write your penis size on your head in inches/cm and then go shopping.
  • Go to a gym with showers and take a shower with chastity cage in front of your gym buddies
  • Take a bunch of photos with you naked and wearing the chastity cage in range of different positions. Send it to the Keyholder
  • Write a 2000 word essay on the benefits of chastity and send it to the Keyholder
  • Take a picture kneeling and naked wearing the chastity cage in a changing room at the shopping centre
  • List 50 reasons why it is a privilege to be allowed to be kept in chastity by the Keyholder (We have acquired this task through a chaste slave and posted it in an article on this website)

What these tasks are designed to do is to incorporate and reinforce the dominant and submissive relationship through the unknown key-holder. Such assignments are not for everyone, and there may be a discussion as to the types of assignments that are doable when setting the guidelines of the relationship – but it is the mission of the dominant to slowly increase your boundaries, though a good dominant will understand those boundaries and push them without breaking them.

 

Solo Chastity:-

The last group of individuals are the ones that simply want to enjoy solo chastity without the influence of others. They could constitute a combination of any of the above mentioned feelings, and they might not have any. They may simply enjoy being caged and the self-control that they are physically putting on themselves. In our next article we will go through some of the safety tips as well as some games that might be played by people in solo chastity.

There are in fact hundreds of thousands of people that prescribe to this and groups like NoFap claim to be a secular porn-recovery community.

The Science of Male Chastity!

How it works

You might not have considered it, but have you ever thought about how your sex life affects your mood? On some careful research and thinking about your own behavior, you might come to conclusion and discover a relationship between sex and mood. Indeed, upon some in depth research we have concluded that the relationship between one’s mood, and sexual activity and orgasm are not considered to be the greatest of mysteries. Indeed, there is a well-researched scientific basis on understanding the biochemical mechanisms that occur before, during and after sexual gratification. In this article, we will explore the relationship between the brain, sexual release, and the science behind male chastity. This in turn, may help you answer some of the questions that you might have had which concerned male chastity, or they might lead to a flurry of research whereby you can explore male chastity in new and profound ways. As we have mentioned elsewhere, to reduce male chastity to the denial of orgasms is simplistic and doesn’t accurately reflect male chastity as a whole.

 

 

The brain is a complex organ and we understand that it is driven by a number of varying neurotransmitters which we can hold accountable for changing our moods throughout the day, and indeed over the course of our lives. But there are only a couple of these neurotransmitters which are also involved with sexual activity; these three being dopamine, prolactin and oxytocin. Men and women can be said to have distinctly different patterns and responses to these neurotransmitters and the argument behind that is that it centres on our ability, needs and desires to procreate as well as to raise our off-spring so that they too can survive long enough to procreate. Why don’t some people feel this need or urge? Well that relates to the fourth factor which is the concentration of receptors for those neurotransmitters and this in particular relates to how the human body handles dopamine. Let’s break down these three neurotransmitters and how they affect our body, and our responses to sexual activity before we move on to how that relates to male chastity.

What is Dopamine:-

Dopamine is commonly associated with the brains reward and pleasure centers. It can cause feelings of pleasure if we partake in certain activities, such as sexual activity, the consumption of calorie rich foods, the ingestion of drugs, or other behaviors such as shopping and gambling. Dopamine is often referred to as the addictive hormone – people with low dopamine levels have been shown to have higher risks of suffering from addictions. Surprisingly, it is dopamine which is also partially responsible for Parkinson’s disease which sees people with a dopamine deficiency potentially developing the illness. The intense pleasure that we obtain from orgasms is as a result of dopamine flooding our reward centers in our brain during sexual activity.

Normal/Elevated Dopamine Levels: Normal levels of dopamine can result in motivation, contentment, an ability to gather pleasure from finishing tasks, optimism, kindness and good natured feelings towards others and bond with them as well as a healthy libido.

Low Dopamine Levels: Lower levels of dopamine can result in depression and an inability to function within the world due to a lack of ambition and drive, it can also result in an inability to feel certain emotions such as love, and often manifests itself into impaired judgement, lack of remorse and social anxiety. Low dopamine levels also adversely affect the libido.

 

 

What Is Prolactin:-

Prolactin is an interesting neurotransmitter and it is named after its ability to affect lactation levels in women. This neurotransmitter has over 300 uses within the body, but it’s effects on the orgasm are well researched in comparison to other uses. An orgasm, through either physical sex or masturbation, will result in a large amount of prolactin being released into the body. It is this chemical which results in a better mood following sexual activity, and can last for over an hour. Prolactin and Dopamine rely on each other for context and control when it comes to sexual activity. Prolactin in men directly affects the refractory period before they can maintain an erection and engage in sexual activities again. The older that you get, the more prolactin is produced in men. Males with a deficiency in prolactin are often able to engage in sexual activity multiple times within a very short amount of time, or they will not lose their erection after climaxing.

Excess levels of prolactin are commonly associated with irritability, decreased testosterone, and a substantial loss of libido.

 

 

What Is Oxytocin:-

Often call the love drug – oxytocin is responsible for the feelings of trust, connectedness, closeness and protection. A burst of oxytocin is produced during orgasm and it is often attributed to the afterglow that we feel post sexual activity. Oxytocin is released during all forms of intimate activity, which includes touching, hugging and caressing. After orgasm, in men, the levels of oxytocin quickly plummet until they are below where they were before sexual activity, whereas in women it will lower itself much more slowly, often remaining higher than it was initially. The reasons for this remain largely unclear, though speculation exists that it is linked to ideas of empathy and is a necessary part of bonding, child birth, and child rearing, this also means that post orgasm that women are far more likely to let their guard down and fall in love.

Normal/Elevated levels of Oxytocin:-

This is the love drug after all and as such elevated levels will result in strong and powerful feelings of emotion, a sense of devotion and closeness, an increased sense of positivist, and feelings or protection and responsibility.

Low Oxytocin Levels:-

Sees a reduction of feelings of attachment and connection, it is also responsible for low libido and depression, as well as a reduction of empathy towards others.

 

How Does This Affect A Man In Chastity?

We just spoke about how an orgasm results in a substantial drop after an orgasm in a male, with the females drop occurring more slowly in the sense of a plateauing effect. What if we were to avoid this sudden drop by removing it all together? In detailed blogposts by Sarah Jameson on her website male chastity blog, she details how after each orgasm there would be a period of time where her partner, John, would not be as engaging in the sense of serving and helping, as he was before his orgasm. She timed this sensation to last for a period of between 7-10 days and she has used this tracking to expand the periods as to which he remains caged. If we switch John to engaging in sexual activity once or twice per week, which could be considered to be normal, then the levels of the neurotransmitters which we have just discussed would never really stabilize and as such it would be a continual roller coaster ride of emotions.

 

Chastity Relationship
Chastity Marriage

 

The most important thing to consider here would be the constant fluctuation of oxytocin levels which are responsible for John’s moods, and his ability to engage in intimate activities with his wife through touching, caressing and other variations of this. For an individual who engages in chastity, or in the case of John has multiple orgasms on a honeymoon like weekend every few months, then he will still experience the immediate downward spiral as a result of the neurotransmitters and his mood will still change as a result of having low dopamine levels and higher prolactin levels.

Unlike his peers though, who will continually have orgasms within the dopamine recovery period, John does not and therefore will not suffer from the fluctuation of the neurotransmitters in the same way as his peers. Indeed, within the fortnight his dopamine levels will have returned to a state of relative normalcy and will continually increase over time through frequent sexual play and through intimacy with his partner whereby he does not get sexual release. One could even argue that a male in a chastity device will have increased levels of dopamine in his system, due to the presence of the chastity cage which he finds arousing.

There are a few theories which suggest that this fluctuation in males is as a result of the need to procreate; that being to get his sexual partner pregnant and then disengage from sexual activity leaving her in a flat lined state of emotions that specialize in empathy and caring and ‘motherly’ natures, that she can use to then deal with pregnancy, child birth, and ultimately child-rearing. This mechanism is cyclic in the sense for a male and probably can be related to gene survival; it would be beneficial for a male to engage in a quantity and variety of sex to ensure it is his genes which are being reproduced across the spectrum and combining them with different women to ensure a mix of children within a short period of time.

Modern medicine has grown our life expectancy to around 80 years, vastly different in comparison to the early 19th century where the average life expectancy was considered to be around 30 years. Indeed, studies suggest that since 1900, the average life expectancy has doubled. Could we then attribute that to the suggestion humans may or may not be geared for monogamous lives as our life expectancy has almost tripled in such a short space of time? We could probably make that argument, especially considering reports that couples in relationships of chastity experience substantially lower rates of divorce and separation than their non-chastity counterparts. Certainly, an interesting thing to consider.

Chastity Games To Play!

Solo Chastity Safety Tips:-

Safety within chastity is pretty much the same as with standard chastity play. However, the most difficult thing will be the absence of a key holder. If you choose not to engage with a key holder, (or even if you do) then it’s a good idea to have some backups to avoid temptation. The Key is the most important part of male chastity. It is what will secure your release, and it is what denies you pleasure and freedom. When you’re in a physical relationship with a key-holder, the denial of the key is pretty simple. Your key holder partner will hold the key, hide the key, and use the key as they deem fit. Regardless of your circumstances we still recommend reading this page so that you can find uses and places for the emergency key though! When you’re not in a relationship or you’re not using a key holder, holding the key becomes a little more tricky. It needs to be something that is unusual, or difficult to get to so that you do not succumb to temptation by using your key. To do that you’ll need to make your key as inaccessible as possible. Here are a few ways and ideas that you could use, or that your partner might use.

 

Finding The Key
Key Play

 

 – Hiding The Key

in a public place. Ideally, you don’t want to be hiding it in a place that is open 24 hours a day and seven days a week as you’ll be easily able to get your key. Places to consider might be, under the carpet in a library or in a seldom used section, somewhere in a shopping mall, or maybe in your gym locker where there’s not 24 hours access. See, the more restrictive that the hiding places opening hours are, the more difficult it going to make it when you go and try and retrieve it. If you’re using an option like this – you might want to get a back-up key in case your first key is accidentally found.

 

– Bury The Key

You might want to bury the key at a bus stop near your home, you might want to bury it near a landmark, or you might enjoy bush-walking and you might find a secluded spot in which you can bury it. Alternatively you could bury it near a farm, tree or fence post or pretty much wherever you like. So long as that it takes some distance to travel to. Putting it somewhere in the country can make it difficult especially if your area is prone to bad weather.

 

– A Glass Bottle

can serve as a key container. Simply plug up the neck with some stuff that can’t be removed, or alternatively melt the neck together after the key has been inserted. You’re basically looking at the idea that the bottle has to be broken in order to get the key out of the bottle. Secondly, the bottle will make for an awesome container if the key needs to be buried somewhere as the glass will not be breaking down anytime soon. (Please don’t put it in a cardboard box)

 

– Hide The Key At Work

You work there, you know all the little hidey holes where you can keep stuff, and where people aren’t going to look. If you’re putting it in a secure/awkward situation at work not only are you unlikely to take the chastity device off until you get home. Also, unless your workplace is open 24 hours, or you have keys, you’re not going to be able to have access to it all day.

 

– Bury It In A Friend’s Garden

without their knowledge. Or alternatively, hide it in their house or garage. Not only will you have to endure the torment of going to visit them when you’re caged, but you won’t be in a position to visit and leave straight away, meaning that there’s either going to be some awkward explaining or some enduring that you’ll have to go through.

 

– Give Your Friends

a spare set of keys with the key on it. This works well if you’re looking at chastity as something long term, as there’s only so many times that you can use the excuse of that you’ve forgotten your keys.

In all of these situations it is best that you keep a secondary back up key just in case. For example, if your friend goes away on holidays without telling you, then you’re certainly going to be in a pickle if you’ve left the key inside their house. Always ensure back up plans, and then make sure that you have back up plans for the back up plans. It might seem like a pain and a hassle but you’re not going to regret it.

 

Chastity can be difficult when you don’t have a partner to engage with – however just because you don’t have anyone else doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy yourself in chastity. What you’ll find below is a list of games that you can play by yourself in order to secure your own release and satisfaction at times. Basically, it’s a reward based system that you would normally get with a key holder, just in this case you’re rewarding yourself. The thing is, you can still enjoy chastity play even before you get someone else involved, and this might be a precursor to seeing if you actually enjoy chastity play without the embarrassment of having to ask someone else. In solo chastity play – you have to be honest with yourself and you have to be your own key holder, it’s not going to work if you’re not being committed to the type of play. Before you engage in extended periods of being caged, you need to ensure that your brand new chastity cage works, and fits well.

Start off by wearing it for short periods of time, and while carrying the key. If at any stage you feel discomfort, pain or anything like that, immediately remove the device and work out what was causing the discomfort. If it was simply in the wrong position, then re position and put back on. But if the problem is serious, like the ring is too small, or the device is too big, then you’re going to have to discontinue use, and get a new device or parts for the device. You’ll also need to start practicing by sleeping with it to ensure that it’s also a good fit for when you’re asleep. This process might take a few days, or even weeks, until you’re completely comfortable and satisfied with the device and you’re comfortable with leaving the key at home.

Start off with small trips, like a shopping trip, friend for lunch etc. and leaving the key at home. You’ll still have access to it, but just not immediately. In this fashion you can build yourself up to wearing the chastity device full time. Depending on your level of commitment you could start off by mirroring a standard key holder relationship by drawing up a contact, which will establish the length of time that you will remain chaste, establishing a list of punishments and so on and so forth. If you’re only going to do it for a few days, you could consider the idea of mailing the key to yourself, either from a neighboring town or similar. This will let you have a taste of chastity and whether you like it or not.

By constructing a list of punishments you could be holding yourself accountable to the contract as well – when playing solo its really up to you as to how far you want to take it. We have compiled a short list of punishments that you could use – penciling in the appropriate extensions depending on the time that you’re being locked up. If it’s only a couple of days you could extend the punishment by hours or days, it’s not really feasible to extend it by weeks or months. Conversely, if you’re locking yourself up for weeks or months, the punishments shouldn’t be hours or days.

– Suggested Male Chastity Penalties

– Not wearing your cage at all times:

– Touching yourself whilst being caged:

– Attempted masturbation/Masturbation

– Orgasm during the period of being locked:

– Not pleasing someone else to the best of your ability whilst locked:

– Failure to complete chores as per the contract:

Once you have sorted out all of the above, including what to do with back up keys you can start your chastity fantasy by engaging in some games! A good way to create a secure and emergency back up key, is to drop the key into a plastic bottle of water and freeze it. You’ll be limited in your access to your key and the ways in which you can quickly access it. It’ll still be there in an emergency, but it won’t be immediate.

Gym Chastity:-

Going to the gym can be hard. Why not motivate yourself by using chastity as a personal trainer? You could ask a friend to put the key in a locker, and they can give you the combination after you’ve worked out, or simply get them to hold onto a bunch of keys (with the chastity on it) for a short period of time. If you successfully work out, you can have access to the key again. If not. . . you’ll remain locked up.

 

 

Chastity Spin:

There are a few websites online which will do something like a chastity spin. You ‘spin’ the wheel and it will give you a task or activity to do. It might add to your time as being chaste, or it might be kind and give you an early freedom. Be careful what you wish for, because this isn’t usually a wheel of kindness.

Spin To Win
Lucky Wheel

The Key Bowl:

For this one you’ll need a bunch of keys, you’ll be better if they are similar keys, you might even find it easier and more convenient to go to the locksmith and buy a bunch of key blanks, or ask them to just do a bunch of random style keys for you. Say it’s a date night and you’re looking for a fun game. You might need to give them a couple of days in order to do this, or buy a bunch of random keys online from ebay. Once you have your keys, put them and the key for the lock in the jar. From here, the choice is yours. You may simply take one key out per day, or for each task/goal that you’ve given yourself you might be rewarded with a key. If you’re really wanting to make this game last as long as possible, return the keys to the bowl at the end of each day/week, or immediately after you discover that it’s the wrong key.

 

Rolling Dice:

For this you can use as little, or as many dice as you want. Starting off from the lowest number possible on the dice make a list of rewards and punishments that you’re going to give yourself. Keep in mind, that the more dice you use the more difficult it’s going to be and the more punishments and rewards that you’re going to have to right (unless you’re going to do ranges)

 

The Internet:

People on the internet are very kind and sweet. If you decide to join a chastity forum, you might decide to announce that for every comment that you get on your post, that you’re going to add X amount to your punishment. Or ask for them to make a suggestion of some kind. Prior to the post, pick a number – you have to follow that number posts instructions. Aren’t random people nice?

 

Make it hard:

Option 1. I’m sure that you have a bunch on anal insertables somewhere in the house (if you don’t go get some – or see option 2). Engage in some delightful anal play for a period of 25 minutes. At the end of this time – simply walk away.

Option 2. Watch your favorite porn for a period of 25 minutes. At the end of the time, walk away.

This one helps if you also do not have access to your back up key for an hour or so. The tease will simply blow your mind.

 

 

 

Swallow it:

This one is certainly not for everyone. Make sure that your key is small enough to swallow without causing any damage. You’ll generally have your key back in 3-5 days. Just in case – make sure you have a backup.

The Kitchen Safe:

This one is not as extreme as swallowing your key. For this one you’ll need to look online. There’s a bunch of lockable cookie jars online, some of them will not even have an override so if its control that you’re after then this is going to be for you. It will force discipline, and you’re going to be in a position that forces you to take the commands of a lifeless being. But hey, that’s chastity! Give someone a spare key, or have a backup just in case.

 

Play Safe And Have Fun!

 

10 Commandments For The Chaste Male!

10 Commandments Of Male Chastity For The Chaste Male!!

 

 

 

ONE:-

Your keyholder is your owner and as such they own every part of you and your body and in return you must love and obey them. Your keyholder is entitled to determine which parts of your body are used, and when they are used. With this in mind, your owner has every right to secure your penis in some form of chastity device of both of your choosing. Your owner may lock you up at any time they choose, and for however long they deem in necessary.

TWO:-

Your owner does not need to provide you with any justification or reason in order to secure you in a chastity device. Your only concern is that your owner wants to, and that by itself is reason enough. Whether you want to be secured or not, has no relevance to the situation as per the agreement made in your relationship and Chastity Document.

THREE:-

Under no circumstances (excepting in health and safety emergencies) are you permitted to attempt to remove, alter, or bypass the chastity device with which you have been secured. You, under the terms of the relationship with which you have agreed to, are fully obligated to co-operate with your owner in the fitting of the chastity device and help your owner in the securement of your manhood. You must draw your owners attention to any fault in the device which may impact on its functionality so that your owner can ensure that the device performs as it is intended to perform.

FOUR:-

It is your responsibility and duty to keep yourself clean and care for in the area of your manhood so that the wearing of the device is not impeded through health concerns. Following regular cleaning and care, you can continue to be locked up for as long as your owner demands it of you. This is inclusive to the submission of prostate milking so that you can be cleaned internally as well.

FIVE:-

You must remember that your owner has locked up your manhood for the precise reason that you can no longer play with yourself or achieve an erection or orgasm. Your manhood is no longer there for your pleasure, but for your owners. Your sole duty is to carry them around for your owner. If erections cause discomfort, then don’t do it.

SIX:-

It is your duty and obligation to inform your owner of your experiences whilst wearing the device. You should regularly look at your chastity cage in order to remind yourself of the pleasures that you once had that were in your control and which are now locked away from you. You should let your owner know how you feel, as they may enjoy hearing about your suffering and longing.

 

 

SEVEN:-

Your owner, in the form of humiliation and subject to your agreement, is entitled to remind you about your inability to obtain an erection, get any form of sexual release. Your owner has taken that away from you and chooses to enjoy that teasing. Your owner can get satisfaction at any time that they want, whereas you cannot. Your owner will find this amusing and want to remind you about this continually.

EIGHT:-

Dependent on the agreement that you have signed, your secret is not entitled to remain a secret. If your owner chooses to tell people about the chastity device, your owner may do so.

NINE:-

Your owner is allowed to provide stimulation to you in any form that they see fit. This may be include, but not be limited to, exposure to erotic imagery and material, direct physical contact.

TEN:-

It is your duty to take pleasure in the idea that your owner takes time from their day in order to control the use of their property and that this will give them amusement. You should always be thankful for having your owner to secure you in a chastity device and you should always be letting them know how thankful you are for that. You should demonstrate this by being attentive and loyal.

Because of this you should take pleasure in the fact that your owner takes the time to control the use of her property and happy that it gives her some amusement. You should always thank her for securing you in chastity and let her know how grateful you are to have your genitals locked up under her control. You should always be happy if she decides to extend your time in chastity and tell her how much you like to continue being emasculated.

Keyholder Rules
Rules for Keyholders

Four Commandments For The Key Holder:-

ONE:-

A key Holder should not have time to play mind games. The fact that they have a key should be indication that they are in charge.

TWO:-

There is no room for obscure power games, or power plays, or even petty maneuvering, the key holder is the key holder and that is the power that they have and are limited to.

THREE:-

A key holder has not right and is not entitled to resort to any form of abusive behaviour not outlined in the in the agreement of the relationship. They are not entitled to name calling, to put you down, belittle or physically abuse you in any form. There are always hack saws!

FOUR:-

The keyholder should remember that if they want something – then they should clearly state their needs and demands. Key Holders should not sulk, they should not confront their chaste male with such phrases as

‘You Should Have Remembered’

Or

‘How Could You Forget’.

There is no room for obscure mind games in chastity.  Gone are the days when chastity and bondage was frowned upon as an alternate lifestyle choice and many partakers now use it as a form of art.

Keyholder FAQ!

Locked Chastity

There is a lot of information about chastity, and some of it can be quite in depth and detailed. If your partner has expressed a desire to wear a chastity device, you might find yourself a little confused. As such, we have compiled a list of FAQ’s with responses specifically geared towards the dominant, key holder, husband/wife whose partner has asked for a chastity cage. This might be a useful page to read before diving into some of the more in depth articles.  It is always great to go to one of the better adult shops where you can gain personal advice.

The idea of being denied sexual delight for the benefit of satisfying you is exceptionally thrilling for your sexual partner. We all have mystery fantasies and dreams and male chastity is only one of those. Since this sexually exciting craving includes the utilization of a chastity cage or belt some of you may find it a bit unusual – and we won’t deny that. However, with time, patience and understanding and a little bit of reading, such as what is found below, you will hopefully find out why it can be arousing, why men like to be held by a chastity device and finally – how it can benefit you and your relationship.

 

Keyholder Facts
Chastity Keyholder

 

Why Does He Find Chastity To Be Sexy?

It’s a mystery obsession that your man finds profoundly provocative, exciting and exceptionally attractive, to the point that even only a picture of a chastity gadget could bring about an erection. But why? Why does he feel the need to lock up his dick behind a cage? Many people say it’s about submission. That it is about submitting his control of his own sexual pleasure to another being. It’s also concerned with physical sensations, as well as the psyche, body, emotions and the perception of self. He will understand the idea of chastity to be a yearning, longing or even obsession.

From his point of view the appeal of the sexual fantasy is that his adoring partner (regardless of sex) holds the key to his manhood, and every one of his sexual desires. His cock becomes your own to do with what you will, to satisfy when and however you like, and you can use his sexual energy to placate your own; you say when and how he reaches climax, and you say when and how you reach climax. You control the very essence of his sexual desire and you can twist and manipulate that (within the boundaries of your relationship) to your every whim and desire.

This does not always mean that he will become submissive in the relationship, though we do acknowledge that there are elements of submission and these will manifest themselves in accordance to the boundaries of your relationship. Indeed, I have read and met many heterosexual and homosexual partners where the relationship dominant and submissive roles have not changed because of a cock cage. Indeed, one woman said that;

 

‘At First I Found It Quite Difficult – Our Marriage Was Certainly Male-Led And I Am By No Means A Dominant Person. However, I Quickly Learned To Use My Femininity To Take Charge Of His Sexual Pleasure. This By No Means Affected Our Primary Relationship, It Was Still A Male Led Marriage And I Was More Than Happy With That Arrangement.’ Edith

As such, you may be dominant in the sexual aspect of the relationship, but you do not necessarily have to be the dominant one overall in the relationship. Wearing a chastity device is not so much about curbing his sexual appetite or excessive masturbation – quite the opposite really. It’s an interesting contradiction. The idea is that a chastity device is meant to limit sexual pleasure in the sense that the sexual pleasure is controlled by someone else. Yet, that idea of having ones sexual pleasure being controlled is arousing to those that want to be caged. What ends up happening is that someone who is wearing a cock cage / chastity device will usually become more aroused than normal by the very nature of wearing a cock cage. In other words, a device that’s supposed to ‘limit’ arousal actually causes the very opposite to occur!

Some people look at it with a profoundly provocative perspective – that the one that who is caged will find his pleasure in satisfying and pleasuring you. At the end of the day a chastity device may cause him to be continually thinking about his key holder’s necessities over his own – whilst you can certainly manipulate the situation into having this occur; his pleasure comes after your own and the sexual release he craves will only occur once you are satisfied – it is important to remember that his caging is also about him. You are not necessarily secondary to that – but his actions, his desires are now as a result of being caged. How you utilize that creative and sexual energy is entirely up to you.

What If I’m Not Interested In Being A Key Holder?

So, if your partner has discovered the strength and courage to let you know that he’s thinking about chastity devices – don’t dismiss him, mock, or put the activity down. Remember, he has just shared something intimate with you and this communication should be encouraged. Something I’ve learned within this industry is

‘Don’t Yuck Someone’s Yum’

Just put it gently aside, say that you need time because you’re a little overwhelmed and then do your own research – make it clear that you’ll come back to him when you’re ready. Even if you are outright against the idea of a chastity cage, do some research anyway. This will indicate that you have given serious consideration to the idea, that you’re acknowledging the importance that it is to him, and will strengthen the relationship regardless.

What’s Special about it?

Chastity between an adoring couples is one of a kind, appealing and stirring. It is an uncommon closeness between you both, which you can keep a secret from the world – when he walks outside it might only be you and he that know he is under a lock and key. The sexual relationship between you both is likely to change as well – that’s not to say it will change completely but it can change in very subtle and profound ways. Taking away his sexual energy and his ability to channel that sexual energy can allow him to refocus that energy to something else. You might find that it is refocused back onto you, or maybe it will be work, family, life or even a combination of them all!

 

 

Will I Have Less Sex Now That He’s Caged?

No.

Male Chastity is about you sharing his sexual dream and him satisfying your sexual needs. His chastity obsession is about satisfying you – however you shouldn’t necessarily take advantage of him wearing the chastity device by getting him to do the cleaning up! (Unless that’s the type of relationship you have both agreed on prior). It’s a mutual loving, caring and supportive relationship and not something that should manifest itself into physical, emotional or mental abuse.

Wearing a Chastity Device does not mean your man is sexually deficient. He can be manly, sexually capable, and appreciate wearing a chastity cage and still be virile and constantly horny. You don’t necessarily have to take charge in the bedroom either – you can still get him to make the first move. Chastity is simply about you controlling his sexual energy.   When you are in the mood you can tease him using some sexy lingerie whilst he is still in chastity – what a buzz being so in control can be.

Being a key holder to your caged up man offers a satisfying sexual coexistence, in an often fun, exciting and joyous way. A way where his thoughts and pleasures are centered on you instead of his cock. Keep in mind that a lot of people believe that sexual activity must result in penetrative sex. By taking the penetration out of it (his) you can fundamentally change the sexual nature of your relationship. This implies and will ultimately demonstrate that sexual joys have a great deal less to do with the traditional PiV/PiA dichotomy than people have given attention to.  Sex and sexuality, arguably has more to do with the joys of extensive foreplay, and the exploration of each other’s bodies. By taking away his act of penetration, it will allow the sexual energy to focus more towards these pursuits than anything else.

 

Should He Be Permitted To Cum?

Yes. How regularly this happens is dependent upon you. He will likely recommend when it ought to be and given his way then this will be all the time but it is important to remember that it is your choice and only your choice as his key holder. Don’t give in to him every time – else he’ll resent the ease of which he can achieve his sexual climax.

 

How Does Chastity Upgrade My Sexual Joy?

Some people find different things arousing. It’s like watching porn, or using a particular toy – at the end of the day there are, within each of us, certain things which tip us over the edge. I mentioned above that a cage will most likely increase his arousal levels – some couples report that this increased arousal makes him more attentive, more in tune with his partner. This sounds sweet – but don’t expect it. If you go into a chastity relationship with this in mind – you may end up with some very sorry expectations. However, he can learn to put your needs and pleasure over his.

In the majority of sexual cultures – sex is generally considered finished after he climaxes and ejaculates. Does this mean that you have also achieved sexual satisfaction? It can sometimes feel like you’ve been watching an awesome film together and he switches it off just before the good scenes come on.

Chastity shows him to think of you and your climaxes and pleasures. Whilst holding his key you could delicately deny him consent to ejaculate until you yourself have achieved sexual pleasure. You could even make him pleasure you multiple times before he earns his reward. He could be expected to serve his keyholder with his tongue and lips or maybe your most loved dildo, with expertise, dedication and adoration. He will inevitably turn into an exotic, fun loving individual whereby he is continually considering the sexual needs of his partner.

 

 

Why Does He Need Me To Hold His Key?

What arouses him is that his penis turns into your property. You control its opportunity. You hold the key. You are his Key holder.  Chastity depends on the excitement of the psyche before the anticipation of his body.  This shows us that the part of the key holder is vital to the chastity relationship. You excite his mind by holding his key which keeps him from touching his penis thus masturbation and sexual pleasure is impossible without your authorization.

When he first hands over his key, some piece of his dream is satisfied, and on the off chance that you agree to be his key holder you could wear the key around your neck – tantalizingly within view but also well beyond his reach. We’d suggest that you examine our Chastity Article about tips, tricks and safety as well. Always check that you have an extra – in the event that something goes wrong!