How To Find BDSM Clubs In Your City

I am not a lawyer, and after a cursory investigation online, I would say the legal position of BDSM is very unclear. If you were to ask me if it is illegal in the USA and UK, I would have to say yes in that if an assault occurs, you are technically committing an offense. However, both countries have recognized BDSM clubs in universities and elsewhere. The only places that you could say it is legal would be Germany, Japan, Netherlands, Scandinavia, and Canada, where you are unlikely to be prosecuted if no severe harm occurs. This is just an opinion and should not be seen as a legal fact.

Privacy in BDSM clubs

Because of the legal situation and the fact that many people are offended by BDSM, those who indulge in it generally value their privacy, which makes finding a club difficult.

You will not find adverts in your local newspaper for BDSM clubs. That just does not happen. To find a club, you will need to have a source from within the BDSM community. Whether a publication, website, or personal contact.

There are two types of BDSM club, the good ones which vet their members, and the others which allow just about anyone in. If you are new to this scene, it is far better to get membership of a club that vets its members before they can join. Your experience will be far better, and you will meet people who are more discreet and in it for the long term.

A Munch

A munch is a social meet-up, often taking place in a public place where members of the community meet for a coffee or a meal and socialize. It is not a place where BDSM activity takes place, it merely is somewhere where people talk about it, and newcomers can attend to find out more. Again, you are not likely to see an advert in the local paper advertising it. You will need to have someone tell you when it is happening.

Single Men

Even when a club states that anyone is welcome to come along, you will find a great deal of suspicion of single men who try to attend. It is felt that usually, these individuals will be merely seeking sex and not as interested in BDSM. Single men can visit, but they should take their time and get known in the group and accepted before being too active.

So How Can You Find Clubs?

It comes down to making contact with a member of the BDSM community. You should go to fetish websites online or use Reddit to met people from the community. You might also try the Meetup website. Once you have made contact with one or two individuals who are in the scene, it will become much easier to find your local club and individuals locally who also share your interests.

About Clubs

I am not sure what you imagine a club will look like. Maybe you have watched porn and seen Gothic looking dungeons and vast pieces of wooden equipment where subs will be strapped and suspended from.

Yes, there are purpose-built venues in some large cities, but the reality your local club is probably going to meet in someone’s house.

You are going to be invited to a private house and you have to be very aware that there are rules and conventions about what you should or should not do.

You will be surprised to find that there is an atmosphere of respect and courtesy, perhaps the last thing you might expect but it’s true.

You Finally Get to Visit the BDSM clubs

So, at long last, you have been invited to attend a meet at an address you have been given. In giving you this address, a great deal of trust has been invested in you. With luck, this might be your chance to become a full member of this exclusive community.

You know on the door and a guy lets you in and checks that you are invited. Some clubs might make you sign a waiver to cover them in the eventuality of something going wrong. Others are just informal.

I suggest that the first night you just mingle and watch the action. Many people like to be watched but do not get involved unless asked. Have a drink or two but remember this is not a place to get drunk. Just enjoy watching and meeting people. On your second visit, you will have a better idea of what is happening and you can maybe get involved.

LINKS

Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMcommunity/

Fetish.com https://www.fetish.com/

The Cage https://thecage.co/

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